Excerpts from the Hitchhiker's Guide...

Monday, February 9

The history of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is now so complicated that every time I tell it I contradict myself, and whenever I do get it right I'm misquoted. So the publication of this omnibus edition seemed like a good opportunity to set the record straight-or at least firmly crooked. Anything that is put down wrong here is, as far as I'm concerned, wrong for good ...

..and thus begins this confounded little book that kept me occupied for two weeks on end.
Now I know why the 'Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy' enjoys cult status in the world of science fiction. Here I post some of the memorable quotes and excerpts from the guide. Read them and you'll know why too..

Far out in the uncharted backwaters of the unfashionable end of the western spiral arm of the Galaxy lies a small unregarded yellow sun.
Orbiting this at a distance of roughly ninety-two million miles is an utterly insignificant little blue green planet whose ape-descended life forms are so amazingly primitive that they still think digital watches are a pretty neat idea.
This planet has - or rather had - a problem, which was this: most of the people on it were unhappy for pretty much of the time. Many solutions were suggested for this problem, but most of these were largely concerned with the movements of small green pieces of paper, which is odd because on the whole it wasn't the small green pieces of paper that were unhappy.
And so the problem remained; lots of the people were mean, and most of them were miserable, even the ones with digital watches.

In those days spirits were brave, the stakes were high, men were real men, women were real women, and small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri were real small furry creatures from Alpha Centauri.

And then, one Thursday, nearly two thousand years after one man had been nailed to a tree for saying how great it would be to be nice to people for a change...

The knack of flying is learning how to throw yourself at the ground and miss.

"What are you talking about? "
"Never mind, eat the fruit. "
"You know, this place almost looks like the Garden of Eden. "
"Eat the fruit. "
"Sounds quite like it too. "

On the bridge of the Heart of Gold, all was silent. Arthur stared at the rack in front of him and
thought. He caught Trillian's eyes as she looked at him inquiringly. He looked back at the rack. Finally he saw it.
He picked up five small plastic squares and laid them on the board that lay just in front of the rack.
The five squares had on them the five letters E, X, Q, U and I.
He laid them next to the letters S, I, T, E.
"Exquisite," he said, "on a triple word score. Scores rather a lot I'm afraid."
- yeah right, brevity as well as subtlety is the soul of wit ;)

Arthur: If I asked you where the hell we were, would I regret it?
Ford: We're safe.
Arthur: Oh good.
Ford: We're in a small galley cabin in one of the spaceships of the Vogon Constructor Fleet.
Arthur: Ah, this is obviously some strange use of the word safe that I wasn't previously aware of.

The Guide is definitive. Reality is frequentlyinaccurate.

"Ford," he said, "you're turning into a penguin. Stop it."

and my favorite one..

"Well, sir," snapped the fragile little creature, "if you could be a little cool about it ..."
"Look," said Zaphod, "I'm up to here with cool, OK? I'm so amazingly cool you could keep a
side of meat inside me for a month. I am so hip I have difficulty seeing over my pelvis. Now will you move before you blow it?"

go pick it up at the local bookstore, you won't regret it :)